7 Steps to Fashion and Photograph an Unforgettable Farewell
Issue #10
[Read Time < 5 Minutes]
It's been 13 hours since you started shooting today's wedding, and your delightful couple has just informed you that they are ready to leave (You can almost hear the angels singing even over the band).
What to do now?
I assume you are familiar with the time-honored tradition of the happy couple leaving at the end of the evening while everyone throws (or blows) some kind of seed-shaped food, scraps of paper, deblossomed flowers or expensive dish soap at them.
Sometimes, the tradition gets fiery, and the guests wave sparklers, flaming swords, or ignite other incendiary devices upon departure.
This is a very exciting part of the evening and an absolute MUST for photos.
I know you see the light at the end of the tunnel, and you can take your shoes off soon, but there is still work to do to complete this night and create the perfect end to your couple's perfect story.
There are two scenarios to address right off the bat.
Scenario A - There's a wedding planner
If this is the case, you don't have to do much handholding with the couple. The planner will take care of that, and they will have (possibly) set up the other pieces.
That still leaves about 50-100 guests to wrangle toward the farewell location for the big send-off. Hint: the planners are good at a LOT of things, but aren't great at this, so it's best if you take charge.
Scenario B - No wedding planner
Same as A, except YOU have to tuck your couple away FIRST before you start wrangling.
Let's get to the tips!
Step #1 The Best Farewell Starts with a Plan
Your couple likely has already made initial plans for this big farewell.
I strongly recommend discussing your options BEFORE the wedding day so you're all on the same page well in advance.
Bird seed
Bubbles
Confetti
Flower Petals
Lavender
Pom Poms
Silly String
Sparklers
Streamers
Did I miss any?
It's important to know two things - what's being thrown and where it's going to happen. Once you know these two, you can start developing the definitive departure.
But what if there's no plan?
On rare occasions, there have been times when the couple initially didn't want a send-off, and a guest tells them, "Hey, you guys should have a big send-off!"
Don't worry, I have a plan for the impromptu version as well, but let's start with the planned version first.
Step #2 Get the Couple Tucked Away
The first thing you need to do is get the couple sequestered from the rest of the guests.
I realize this might sound somewhat cruel (taking the couple away from their family and friends), but it's safe to expect that everyone has been lubricated with libations, so if you don't pull them away now, you might never have a chance.
If you think the ladies get emotional at goodbyes, just wait until you see the groom's fraternity brothers get a nasty case of the "I Love You, Mans!"
It's best to get the bride, groom and their folks to a nearby room so they can start gathering their things and say their goodbyes.
Just don't forget to peek in on them for a shot of that nice emotional moment.
Step #3 Start Wrangling the Guests
Planner or not, no one can get the guests to the designated departure zone better than you.
Now, if you've ever been a bouncer at a bar, you'll remember the drill. For those who have not had the pleasure, allow me to introduce you to your greatest weapon - The Band/DJ.
You're not the only one who has been working this evening.
Our entertaining brothers and sisters are ready to head home as well, and like you, they still have to pack up their gear.
"The Last Song" - music to the ears of everyone from the staff of the venue to the valets
Once that last note is played and the lights go up, it's time to start shepherding the guests to the doors.
This is easier in the warmer weather months, but you'll have to be creative during the winter. I recommend a place just inside the door until you're ready to line everyone up.
Pro Tip: Be friendly and playful, but assertive...although not too assertive. Remember, folks have been drinking, dancing and having a great time for hours, and you're turning off the fun and sending them home. If you have a humorous side, this is a good time to show it off.
The bottom line - start mooooving everyone outside (yup, that's a cattle rustling reference)
Step #4 Line 'Em Up
Here's where the fun begins!
For a traditional send-off, you'll make two columns of people, creating a runway of guests for the newlyweds to traverse on their way to marital bliss.
This sounds easy enough, but remember, folks may have been drinking, so I pretend I'm a flight attendant giving instructions to the passengers.
You know no one is listening, but you still have an important job to do, so try to make it as efficiently entertaining as possible.
IMPORTANT NOTE
This is when some lucky "voluntolds" will be handing out what will be thrown or waved upon the couple's exit.
IF it's anything except sparklers, you don't have much to worry about.
IF it is sparkers, I highly recommend NOT passing them out until everyone is lined up.
Yes, we're still living in a time when people carry their own form of fire igniters, and yes, it is probably (expected) that an ambitiously inebriated person will light their sparkler as soon as they get a chance (and probably start a premature chain).
Removing this temptation early is best by getting the guests lined up first and THEN passing out the firesticks.
Once everyone is in a reasonably balanced line, you return to the couple.
Step #5 Get the Newlyweds Ready to Roll
Now you can dash over to where you've stashed the couple and give them the good news - "it's time to make your grand farewell!"
ANOTHER IMPORTANT NOTE:
Let your couple know that there's no hurry for this procession. "Take your time, take it all in and just enjoy this moment."
The last thing you want is for them to race out and leave you with one or two (possibly) usable shots.
Oh, and while we're still mentioning important things, make sure you have PLENTY of bullets left in your camera and fresh batteries in your flash. This is NOT the time to run out of anything.
If the guests are throwing flowers or confetti (basically anything except sparklers), I'll tell my couple to count to thirty and c'mon down!
This gives you plenty of time to run to the end of the line and give a big holler to everyone to get ready for the big reveal.
If there are sparklers, tell your couple to get ready, and you'll be back to give them the green light.
Now you return to guests and light 'em up!
When EVERYONE is sparkling, give your couple a thumbs up and tell them to c'mon down!
Step #6 Here They Come!
I don't need to say anything here except shoot, shoot, shoot!
If you're blessed with daylight, pop that sucker into multiple-exposure mode and blaze away.
If it's dark (and it usually is), you'll need your flash so focus-click, focus-click, focus-click as much as you can.
I mentioned this earlier, but this is an incredible time for memorable photos. Get as many as humanly possible.
When you have two people in a dimly lit situation moving towards you on a very short runway, it can be stressful, I won't lie.
Just keep your head and keep your index finger pushing that button.
It's completely optional, but if you'd like to stop the couple at the end of the runway and have them kiss, dip with a kiss, or do something like that, GREAT!
Something like this is easy to suggest with a couple before they start walking, and it makes for a fairly easy shot to grab since they're not moving.
Step #7 See Them Off
It's safe to assume the couple will be leaving in anything except an Uber (although I'm sure it's happened).
No matter who is driving, grabbing a shot of the couple waving from the back of the car or out the window as they drive away is always fun.
Don't be shy. You may have to tap on the window to remind them to "wave to the fans." These are the final shots of the night, so do what you need to do.
Of course, a shot of the car pulling away is always nice, and if there are various toys tied to the bumper, that's an even nicer touch to get as well.
Bonus Step - The Impromptu Farewell
Some couples don't go in for all the pomp and pageantry of La Grand Adieu, but once the ceremony is complete, the party has started, and everyone is having a big time, they change their mind.
Wait, there's nothing to throw!
If there are flowers, there's something to throw. Each bud has a dozen or so petals, so it won't take much to make sure everyone has a fistful of flowers.
You line 'em up, ask a bridesmaid to pinch some petals, and you're good to go.
It's too cold to go outside!
No problem, find the nearest doorway or elevator near the exit, line 'em up, and send 'em off.
You don't have to make this overly complicated. Just tuck the couple away for a few minutes, enlist the help of the bridesmaids or groomsmen, and you'll be able to make this happen easy-peasy.
This is a really fun and memorable photographic moment that's worth a little extra effort.
Even the most modest wedding can shine bright with a big farewell and create the perfect punctuation to your day of pictures (I prefer saying "photos," but I like the alliteration more :)
"If you're brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello."
– Paulo Coelho
Ensuring your couple is sent off in style is one of the little parts of the "inner game of wedding photography."
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